woman performing a juggling act

Why Busy Moms Need to Prioritize Their Juggling Act

I lost momentum on this blog thread for a good while this year. My commitment to post once a week no matter what fell to the wayside in March. That month heralded the onset of early-pregnancy nausea in the evenings (my prime writing time). Wisconsin’s stay-home order also went into effect and I just felt lost for a while – head spinning, trying to understand everything going on while feeling utterly exhausted from the pregnancy. The pause became a gift. I was quiet long enough to hear the whispered wishes from my heart. Quiet long enough to prioritize what’s most important. This busy mom is finally prioritizing the juggling act.

Your One Thing

Some time ago, I wrote a post about Your One Thing. It’s based on a book that recommends prioritizing based on the one thing that – once done – will make everything else easier. I actively employed that idea – my One Thing at work, my One Thing for housework, my One Thing for this blog, my One Thing for health. But I ignored the wisdom of someone else, who said there has to be a One Thing for all of it. One thing that I care most about and prioritize above all else.

For me, that was health. And I knew it. But I so desperately wanted to run a blog and start up a business where I feel challenged. I so desperately wanted to be part of a choir and make friends and make music. All this while holding a full time job and giving all my love to the sweetest little one-year-old on the block – dinner by 6 pm, stories and songs and bedtime by 7:30 pm sharp.

I wanted to do it all. So to Lady Health I said, “I’ll take care of you, too, but it’s going to have to be mixed in with everything else.” Then the pandemic hit and like you, I was suddenly at home all the time. No choir, no going out to see people, no date nights with my husband. I was suddenly relieved of the daily, intensely stressful routine of getting my daughter to daycare and myself to work relatively on time. I no longer had to spend 40 minutes a day commuting during rush hour.

Suddenly, health could take a front seat. With my usual activities gone, my body has been slowly remembering how to relax. Relaxing, it turns out, isn’t something you can will your mind to do. Not something you can force a body constantly in fight-or-flight mode to shift to. I find myself holding a softer smile, a more joyful, open presence. I didn’t know I was so constantly tense. I had no idea. But now I feel like the me I remember from years ago. I’ve missed her and I don’t fully know when she disappeared.

It’s safe to prioritize the juggling act

So, my path ahead is clear. I must be infinitely gentle with my body. This body that carries me and sustains me and is me. This body has wanted to be this calm for a long time. Continuing this may mean some major life shifts – a reckoning with what success means for me, a willingness to let go of who I think I am for who my heart wants me to be.

My personal vision for self care has also changed. It’s more than the occasional self-pampering get-away and saying kind things to myself. It’s a deep acknowledgment and honoring of what I need most as a physical being in this world. A commitment to honoring those needs while trusting that all my dreams are there and will still come true. It’s safe to prioritize the juggling act. I don’t need to push so hard. Neither do you. <3

Woman surrounded by spring flowers. You can boost your mood, even with spring fever!

How to feel joyful when you’ve got spring fever

A flush of weather in the high 40s hit Wisconsin over the weekend, turning my mind to spring and the tulip and dwarf iris bulbs I planted last fall. They’re somewhere under the frozen layer of earth, brimming with bottled energy. I can feel it. Soon I’ll turn around and there they’ll be – a rainbow of colors gracing my yard, hopefully giving passers-by a reason to smile. What about you? Has spring fever hit? Today I’d like to offer you some easy-to-do tips that will spark feelings of well being, even as we wait for sunshine and flowers. 

Create joyful spaces

In a thoughtful and uplifting blog post called “7 emotional lessons for a more joyful life,” Ingrid Fettel Lee writes, “Because joy is small, it’s accessible. I might not know how to be happy on a particular day, but I know that I can find one or two moments of joy that I might not have had otherwise.” I love this idea. Some days, I’m not sure how to pull myself out of a funk but I do know that I can hold gratitude for a flash of color or a pretty bake brought to the office by a co-worker. Small moments that spark joy are everywhere, and they can be intentionally created. 

Ingrid’s words speak to the concept of joy-making that I recently stumbled upon in my own life. I never realized it before, but by the small act of placing something that evokes loving and joyful emotions, I can completely transform how I feel about a space.  Slowly, oh so slowly, I’ve been bringing me-things into my office. Plants and artwork and most recently, a framed photo of my daughter wearing a sweet, knit fox hat. That picture was the missing piece; it turned my office into a place I like spending time. Every time I look at her face, positive feelings fill my mind and body.

You can spark joy in any of your spaces, too. That all-black outfit could have some bright earrings or a scarf. A bright layer of paint or art could make the bathroom a space where you feel energized. Maybe scents or musical sounds from special pieces of your past could be brought into your present, ready to help you transform your mood. 

Make New Beliefs About Yourself

Here’s another inspiring bit of writing that can make the best of spring fever. It’s so full of love and hope for all of us – wisdom on how to follow our hearts to our joy. “How to Create Joy Today: 7 tips for a Happy Life,” by Sarah Maude over on the Tiny Buddha blog. It’s hard to pull just one quote from this, but I will say that the section on spring cleaning your belief system resonates. Sarah writes, “Many people believe they have to live with the cards they have been dealt, that life is tough, or if you want something you have to fight for it. Yet beliefs are only thoughts that we keep thinking. No belief is set in stone.” 

Isn’t that on point? We build beliefs because they seem to fit circumstances. Years later, those beliefs still whisper to us even if our spirits and lives are calling us to do and be and believe something totally different.

Personally, I straddle two worlds – a researcher by day, and a creative writer and singer by night, slowly forming community. I dream of more time to bake and play with new art forms; discovering parts of me that are waiting to be born. Through it all, I have started to wonder, what limiting beliefs are holding me back? What limiting beliefs might be preventing me from the fullness of who I could be and the experiences I could have?

Sarah challenges us to ask ourselves: “Where has this belief come from?” “What does this belief cost me on a daily basis?” “What would happen if I let go of this old belief?”

Sarah Maude on Tiny Buddha

Good thoughts to ponder as we wait for spring. I know that the longer days ahead will bring with them a boost in energy. Perhaps you and I will be prepared to use that energy to rewrite those limiting beliefs into something powerful and true. 

Love that body of yours

It’s a strange thing, isn’t it? How we consider our bodies separate from our selves, like a thing we own instead of the thing we are. The body is entwined with our moods and thoughts and beliefs. A healthy body can overcome a lot of spring fever blues. It becomes easier to think thoughts, create joy, and re-frame limiting beliefs. 

This Forbes article has some spot-on suggestions for beating the winter blues. Among them are exercising, eating healthy, sleeping well, making meaningful connections, and engaging in healthy activities like mediation. Also, don’t forget that supplements can make a difference. Vitamin D sits at the top of the list in this Mindbodygreen article. It’s key in supporting our immune systems and boosting our moods.

For all you post-partum mamas out there, keep in mind that a blood panel can help you figure out if your body needs extra support. Pregnancy takes a toll and a personal blood-panel can be the thing that kick-starts a path to wellness. Even women who had their babies years ago might still carry an imbalance from their pregnancy.  

Here comes the sun

Spring is coming, I promise! In the meantime, I hope the resources provided today give you some mood-boosting inspiration as you move through spring fever. And wherever you are, whatever you’re up to this week – know that I’m cheering for you. We are all blessed because you’re here on this planet, loving and living and shining light into the world as only you can. Stand tall, sister.

***If you liked this post, please share it to social media! The Love Your Mom Life 101 online course is about to launch. I’m grateful to all who help spread the word by sharing links to the blog or website! The course will teach moms how to quickly free up 2 hours per day so that they can enjoy their beautiful lives without stressing over their to-do lists. So thrilled to be launching this amazing resource!